Thorn

Spiritual Clinic: The Purpose of Suffering

The Thorn.

The world and all whom are in it seem to be at a constant antithesis amongst each other. Whether the world disagrees on statistics, politics, morals, fashion, or example, the world does not share many mutual commonalities. Though, is it undeniable that we all do share trials and great adversities from time to time.
Being here in Spain for a second time would seem to everyone as a “great opportunity” or “such a blessing” or even “oh! You are so lucky, that’s something that I would love to do, if I was still single”. But in a harsh reality, the first few weeks here has been everything BUT. What is so amazing is that even though these words come off so negative and ungrateful, they, like many rough beginnings, end with the sweet realization of the love of the Lord.
There are many who know my story and how the Lord has beautifully and completely redirected my path and desires. Though I was completely untrusting at points, the Lord always continued to be so faithful, patient, and loving. As I gave the Lord one semester of bible college, He led me to my second, and left me with a “peace” to continue my third back out here in Mallorca. As the summer came to an end, so did my peace. The week before my departure, my feelings, emotions, and comfort was a wreck. I loved the ministry I had at home, the relationship I had with my family, and the fellowship I had with my friends. I had such a great ministry and environment at home, why should I go 9,000 miles across the world to find “another” ministry? Why can’t I stay at home, and watch “my” family bible study continue to grow? Why can’t I just stay at home and finally start “my” schooling for medicine? Why cant I stay and make sure “my” grandma and her kidney gets prayed for? … All these questions intruded my mind and hardened my heart… and when the time came, I uneasily boarded the plane.
These past three weeks have gone by, and I have prayed night and day that I was in the Lord’s will. I prayed so fervently that the Lord would pick up my heart and mind at home, and reunite it with my body in Mallorca. My desire was spoken, that I would truly seek His will here, and that I would enjoy and utilize this blessing that He had given me. I wanted to bring reality to the things that all the people back at home “thought” Bible College was. I truly did desire that my desire would be parallel to His. I even cried in women’s discipleship class last week! … Hoping that maybe, just maybe, it was the Lord that was breaking me and reminding me that this is where he wants me. And prayer after prayer, the Lord stayed quiet, until now.
The third chapter of the book “A Spiritual Clinic” is titled “THE PURPOSE OF SUFFERING”…. Okay, so yes, it sounds a bit dramatic, but wait until you see how the Lord may use it for you too…
Because these last three weeks I have felt like I have been living in a complete “chick flick” movie… going out and eating ice cream when I miss home, or calling the people that I miss so much every chance I get, or listening to every depressing slow song that come onto my computer, I have also had the privilege of reading every scripture that has to do with dying, suffering, doubting, hating, stressing, and you know, all the horrible ones. Haha! …. Anyways, today I came across the definition of the word “Thorn”. A thorn is a synonym for the word splinter, stake, painful idea, migraine, malaria, epilepsy, and a bunch of other painful diseases and stuff… okay, so I realize that I’m not dying of malaria and I’m not being stoned to death out here, but it truly spoke to me…
So Paul the Apostle, I’m thinking, probably earned the right to say that he “suffered in the name of Christ”, well up until today I thought that I earned that right too. In many ways I felt like Paul. As he began to pray impulsively and persistently for the removal of pain that he felt, he began to inquire to the Lord why He wasn’t removing it right away. Most believers so easily get it into their minds that God would never refuse to answer a prayer for the removal of something morally or spiritually evil. So every time something painful happens to us, we usually take the time to, now, pray real hard, right? We use our big words and all of a sudden throw out all of the Lord’s titles “Father who art in Heaven, Who created the Heavens and the Earth, and the Sea too, and Who Knows all the hairs on all the peoples heads in here, and Who … please help me right now!” Though all these things of the Lord are indeed true, it is also here where we need to realize that there is no such thing as purposeless pain to God’s children. God’s “unanswered” prayer to heal us, is probably the best thing that will ever happen to you in your relationship with Christ. We must be reminded that we are made weak, so that we might obey. Our personal thorn will vary between a physical limitation, a temporal weakness, a deformity, or a physical loss (homesick)… whatever it may be just know that the thorn had never lost any of its sharpness, nor ever became less severe; but it is by the grace of God that makes the pain so loving .The Lord is there and is not going to take it away, but He will be there to watch you grow. So we can either choose to accept the pain and have the Lord, or not have the Lord and just have the pain. [What can’t be cured, can be enjoyed], So I have come to the conclusion that though ice cream is good, and depressing country songs are quite catchy, I would rather trade that time in for spending it with the Lord, and finally appreciating what He has given me. Coming to the realization that the Lord doesn’t need me back at home. Knowing that the ministry is still continuing, and in some ways continuing even better than when I was there, and knowing that my prayers are the same here as they were there, and knowing that He has me here because He loves me; that knowledge alone, is worth getting on that plane and being here, writing this encouragement to you all.

I love the Lord. I am so excited to know that He has “home” under his wings, and I am forever thankful for this “home” I have here in Mallorca.

… Oh yea, and about the whole “peace” thing. Turns out the peace I “had”, never left. I just had to let go of “my” definition of it as being this fluffy, pillow of a feeling and realize that it can be simply, movement without friction… in other words, even if times are sucky but you can still move forward for the Lord, you are going in the right direction, sooo keep on truckin’ !

Man, God is good.

-Adrianna